The Day Sorrow & Joy danced MOC11

KittyY, Jan 22, 2018

Description:: ouch yall! Sometimes the worst of days can bring out my best writing.

I've had conflicting emotions before, but on this particular day, they were raw and vulnerable. I was on Floor 3 of the hospital celebrating the birth of my first grandchild. She was beautiful and perfect and I was so proud of her Mom, I thought my heart would burst from joy. As the day went on, I held the sweet baby and loved on her Mom. I also watched the clock in the room with dread without even realizing it. See, on Floor 1, there was a memorial service going on. It was for moms who had recently lost a baby and I was one of the unfortunate ones to receive an invitation to this event. As the clock ticked, I knew the service was going on and I felt so conflicted. Do I stay on Floor 3 to celebrate this sweet new life, or do I go to Floor 1 and say goodbye to another? So I excused myself to attend the service on Floor 1. Now, while I had certainly cried over this loss, on this particular day, I became aware about just how many tears were left inside of me. I went to the chapel and thanked God for allowing me to be her mom, even if for such a short time. I laid a flower down at the grave and I cried. A soul cleansing, raw cry. The kind where you can almost feel your heart tearing. I then went back up to Floor 3, held my sweet granddaughter and my smile returned. It was as if sorrow & joy were dancing.

Used:
Believe by ForeverJoy
https://the-lilypad.com/store/BELIEVE.html

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