feeling more at home

I think you're right @Tiff it was all about getting validation from the community, and I really lost the fun element of my hobby. I haven't been active in the papercrafting community since September last year and I'm only just getting my mojo back! The community is so huge no-one even noticed I was gone LOL!! At least here it's really cosy and we all are getting to know eachother.

It is something that I struggle with off and on. We want to be individuals, but we also need to be part of a community and accepted. Validation is good, I think every human needs to be validated by our peers and by our families.

I'm feeling really inspired right now to get more involved with the scrapping community, and get into the gallery and leave more comments. Some scrappers are also designers, and scrappers can be on teams and have a bit more access to "the business" side of things, and scrappers want this business to stick around!! Sometimes the emphasis on product can feel overwhelming. I am on two CTs, but I still identify more as a customer/outsider to the business. I'm glad that the pure hobbiest/customer has a place here.
 
I'm not a CT, have never applied for a CT. With my stressful FT job, I think it might push me over the edge. :circles

I linked up with The LilyPad because I was a long-time follower of Sissy Sparrows and continued with their challenges here. Then I found out about the ATC swap and I haven't missed a swap yet. And along came January 2016 with the month of challenges and now I'm hooked. :heartslub
 
Jen... you know how happy I have been since you started spending more time here, and how happy I was when you won the MOC... and I am always amazed at your talent and so much hard work...
@jk703

nowe there is something in which my mind & heart work differently to you girls

This!!! I have to be happy to scrap! When I am not I don't like what I create or I cannot create at all! And balance and finding the fit is key!

I realized my team limit/project limit quite quickly and I pretty much stick to it. I have to especially since I work full time. Scrapping is my fin and escape!!!

And honesty I was feeling a little stuck in the paper wold when I saw @Scrapping with Liz post about paper scrappers. Once I started playing with her templates I started loving to create again. And going hybrid has just been a joy!!!!

I also think a lot of it has to do with finding a community just to hang out again!!!

with me?
not necessarily..... as a matter of fact, I was chatting the other night with a friend and I mentioned the fact that I only draw when I'm feeling low ... with the scrapping... it actually helps me to get out of the black hole.... it gets me looking at how blessed/lucky I am to have the gift of being able to create, AND all that comes involved with it.
I'm happier when I scrap, I am happier when I see the amazing pages, the inspirational people who create pages that, be that art journal or PL, give me an insight on their hearts and souls, their everyday life and I feel a bit part of their family, and more so, I have made great friendships that have been my safe rope to not completely break down....

I may, though, not be too chatty over here, but I have learned especially in the past few months that forcing myself to communicate, at least in a general way here, also makes me better.
I think every person is a whole world of feelings and every one works differently... but I am so so very glad and lucky to be part of this family. Of course I love, treasure, not only the fact of being a Polly, but see it as a chance to help continuously make this place the amazing place it is, that has given me so much support, love, help and makes me grow, from day one... from the time when I started buying without being active in the community, to every moment I spent with no CTs here, and every moment with my individual CTs, and now as a Polly.
:heartlub:heartlub:heartlub
 
First, I was a scrapper before I was a designer . . . and well, I'm **still** a scrapper. LOL

I'll admit, I longed for recognition and affirmation in this community myself. I sought CT spots, participated in contests, completed challenges, etc., to get feedback that what I was doing was beautiful, that I was worth something. I was successful. I won prizes and bragging rights, and I had a lot of fellow scrappers affirm that I was talented. It did feel good. I'm not gonna lie, it was fun! Yet at the end of it all, those accomplishments faded away and I was left with me and my insecurities and feelings of inadequacy.

I came to a point where I had to reassess what I was doing and WHY I was doing it. My pages didn't undergo an overhaul, but **I** did. Instead of focusing on what reaction I would get when I finished this layout or that layout, I thought about the photos, and the love for my family, and what I would want to look back and remember, and what I would want my family to remember. Sure, I still love to get a "like" or comment on my creations. Who doesn't? The bottom line now is that I know what I'm creating is valuable and worthwhile, because it's valuable and worthwhile to **me**. And it's fun! I have a blast creating every single day and participating in the community.

We are all insecure. We all want validation and recognition. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. It's exactly why I love the TLP community, because there is so much interaction and encouragement. Daily there is someone lifting someone else's spirits, whether it's by commenting on their layout or about something personal going on in their lives.

Here's my encouragement: no matter what your goals are, to be on a CT, or to finish an album, or to have a particular scrap idol comment on your layout, or to find new friends here . . . whatever it may be . . . stop for a moment and realize that you are incredibly talented. You can manipulate pixels like mad! Not everyone can scrap digitally, but you can! You are loving. You love your family and friends and your life, and you spend time creating something beautiful to commemorate them. You are encouraging. You leave comments for fellow scrappers because you appreciate what they've created. You are an amazing photographer. You take time to pull out your camera and capture people and events. You are a writer. You tell the stories of your life. You are keeper of memories, and you do it in a way that no one else can.

We are all unique and have different levels of experience and talent, but we do all share one thing: we love scrapbooking. I'm so thankful for each one of you here. I love that I could tell y'all that I feel insecure, and I'm not worried that I'm going to be made fun of for admitting that.

Wow. This was a lot of rambling. I apologize. LOL Just know that whatever title you have . . . you are loved and appreciated here.
 
This is why I scrapbook -- This is a story that my son wrote for me on his blog in 2011. This is all I need!
Of course I made a layout with this story, but it was long before I found TLP so I won't post it; but it's the story that's important.

Sci-Fi Madre
May 14, 2011
My mother re-wrote history for me. How many people can say that?

In my sophomore year of college I went through a really terrible breakup. It was my first one, after a multi year relation ship and I was in a bad place for a long while. We were in the same major and so I had to put up with being around my ex far more than I would like.

My mother scrapbooks. She has been doing so since I was in elementary school, and we have books that document every year of our family since she started. Birthdays, major holidays and other big events get documented so we can remember them. Sometimes she can be a year or two behind on a given book but thats’ just because she puts so much work into each one.

As I was going through the worst (and only, at that point) breakup of my life, my mother was scrapbooking. I didn’t know it at the time, but she was also rewriting history. I spent a lot of time with my girlfriend when we were together, and it showed up in pictures. It’s bound to happen. But my mother saw the pain I was in at the time and wanted to do everything she could to make me feel better. I don’t know exactly how far behind she was in her scrapbooking, but from that moment forward, she removed any picture with the woman who became my ex. My mother would not let anybody who had so strongly hurt her son grace the pages of a book as sacred as our family album. She later told me about it when she finished the book, I was surprised by it, and didn’t really know what to think. On the page about my first birthday in college there is a picture of me holding up a shirt about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and smiling. I know my then girlfriend was sitting next to me on the couch, but there is no trace of her in the book. I know what to think now. I know my mother did it out of an incredibly powerful love. So now when I look at that picture, or put on that shirt, I don’t think about the breakup that tore me to pieces. Instead, I think about my mother who loves me so much she would rewrite history to make me happy.

Mother’s day was last week and I got to spend it with my parents because it was also the weekend of my graduation from grad school. I got my mom a book of stories put together by the Story Corps about moms. We talked a little about the organization, which I am a big fan of, and how they have the amazing goal of recording everybody’s stories.

This is one of my stories about my mom and the second half of my Mother’s Day gift to her. Thank you.
 
@kimingvtx
you
are
the
best
mom!
that you put such gratefulness into your son, that he wrote those words that made me cry happy happy tears...and that he can wear the TNJ (I'm a huge fan of the turtles) and smile is just the best ever!
I too make books for all year (I split them up into quarterly now) and it is so so good to see my kids enjoy them. I can only hope they appreciate them as much as your son! and that girl...oh she lost a good one!!
 
First, I was a scrapper before I was a designer . . . and well, I'm **still** a scrapper. LOL

I'll admit, I longed for recognition and affirmation in this community myself. I sought CT spots, participated in contests, completed challenges, etc., to get feedback that what I was doing was beautiful, that I was worth something. I was successful. I won prizes and bragging rights, and I had a lot of fellow scrappers affirm that I was talented. It did feel good. I'm not gonna lie, it was fun! Yet at the end of it all, those accomplishments faded away and I was left with me and my insecurities and feelings of inadequacy.

I came to a point where I had to reassess what I was doing and WHY I was doing it. My pages didn't undergo an overhaul, but **I** did. Instead of focusing on what reaction I would get when I finished this layout or that layout, I thought about the photos, and the love for my family, and what I would want to look back and remember, and what I would want my family to remember. Sure, I still love to get a "like" or comment on my creations. Who doesn't? The bottom line now is that I know what I'm creating is valuable and worthwhile, because it's valuable and worthwhile to **me**. And it's fun! I have a blast creating every single day and participating in the community.

We are all insecure. We all want validation and recognition. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. It's exactly why I love the TLP community, because there is so much interaction and encouragement. Daily there is someone lifting someone else's spirits, whether it's by commenting on their layout or about something personal going on in their lives.

Here's my encouragement: no matter what your goals are, to be on a CT, or to finish an album, or to have a particular scrap idol comment on your layout, or to find new friends here . . . whatever it may be . . . stop for a moment and realize that you are incredibly talented. You can manipulate pixels like mad! Not everyone can scrap digitally, but you can! You are loving. You love your family and friends and your life, and you spend time creating something beautiful to commemorate them. You are encouraging. You leave comments for fellow scrappers because you appreciate what they've created. You are an amazing photographer. You take time to pull out your camera and capture people and events. You are a writer. You tell the stories of your life. You are keeper of memories, and you do it in a way that no one else can.

We are all unique and have different levels of experience and talent, but we do all share one thing: we love scrapbooking. I'm so thankful for each one of you here. I love that I could tell y'all that I feel insecure, and I'm not worried that I'm going to be made fun of for admitting that.

Wow. This was a lot of rambling. I apologize. LOL Just know that whatever title you have . . . you are loved and appreciated here.

I love this. You hit the nail on the head. In the beginning I scrapped (mostly paper) for myself and my family and I didn't really care what other people thought (and they were pretty ordinary pages, so I am glad I didn't care what people thought, lol!). But I noticed that slowly over the years my scrapping started to be about the comments I might receive, who might think it is wonderful, if it would get shared as a standout, and less about the photos and the story. I wanted to be on a CT but I didn't have the nerve to apply in case they said no. I didn't want to be told I wasn't good enough. (even though I know that's absolutely not what designers are saying!)
I had to take a step back and remember why I was scrapping. And because I mostly scrap for challenges it was hard because I still wanted to get all the challenges done. Now, if I am not happy with the page because I made it conform to the challenge and I have left the heart out, I don't post it, I usually trash it. I want my pages full of love.
As for CT-ing, it is not in the cards for me at the moment. I would absolutely love to, but I am struggling to get more than 3 pages done a month. And family life is way too demanding to be confident that I could get any more done regularly.

This is why I scrapbook -- This is a story that my son wrote for me on his blog in 2011. This is all I need!
Of course I made a layout with this story, but it was long before I found TLP so I won't post it; but it's the story that's important.

Sci-Fi Madre
May 14, 2011
My mother re-wrote history for me. How many people can say that?

In my sophomore year of college I went through a really terrible breakup. It was my first one, after a multi year relation ship and I was in a bad place for a long while. We were in the same major and so I had to put up with being around my ex far more than I would like.

My mother scrapbooks. She has been doing so since I was in elementary school, and we have books that document every year of our family since she started. Birthdays, major holidays and other big events get documented so we can remember them. Sometimes she can be a year or two behind on a given book but thats’ just because she puts so much work into each one.

As I was going through the worst (and only, at that point) breakup of my life, my mother was scrapbooking. I didn’t know it at the time, but she was also rewriting history. I spent a lot of time with my girlfriend when we were together, and it showed up in pictures. It’s bound to happen. But my mother saw the pain I was in at the time and wanted to do everything she could to make me feel better. I don’t know exactly how far behind she was in her scrapbooking, but from that moment forward, she removed any picture with the woman who became my ex. My mother would not let anybody who had so strongly hurt her son grace the pages of a book as sacred as our family album. She later told me about it when she finished the book, I was surprised by it, and didn’t really know what to think. On the page about my first birthday in college there is a picture of me holding up a shirt about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and smiling. I know my then girlfriend was sitting next to me on the couch, but there is no trace of her in the book. I know what to think now. I know my mother did it out of an incredibly powerful love. So now when I look at that picture, or put on that shirt, I don’t think about the breakup that tore me to pieces. Instead, I think about my mother who loves me so much she would rewrite history to make me happy.

Mother’s day was last week and I got to spend it with my parents because it was also the weekend of my graduation from grad school. I got my mom a book of stories put together by the Story Corps about moms. We talked a little about the organization, which I am a big fan of, and how they have the amazing goal of recording everybody’s stories.

This is one of my stories about my mom and the second half of my Mother’s Day gift to her. Thank you.

This is so beautiful!! You are a wonderful Mum!
 
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