Blink of an Eye

Amy Wolff: Remember Sept, Bittersweet
Little Butterfly Wings: Butterfly Basics: New Year, Free as a Bird
Valorie Wibbens: Pollyanna Alpha

It makes me cry to think how quickly things have changed in the blink of an eye. You went from this tiny little thing who tried to eat rocks outside our apartment door to this sassy almost high school student in what seems overnight. Where have the years gone? 14 years ago, it was a freezing cold December night. I had spent most of the last few hours walking our local stores shopping for last minute Christmas gifts as much as my body would permit; thinking it was just another fake labor. I was dying to meet you and could not wait any longer. 14 years ago, you came into my world. You changed me completely, you made me a mother. You are my first baby, well the first that survived. You always will be. Someday when you have children of your own you will comprehend all that that means. Because you are my 1st, that will always mean unchartered territory for me. Sometimes I get it right, often I do not. You and your needs are always at the top of my list. I want you to know how much I love to watch you. I love watching you sing, dance, climb, swim, and twirl. I love watching you throw, catch, and smile. Aw, your smile lights your already beyond beautiful face. Your smile makes your beautiful spirit all the more engaging. Binks, you teach me so many things; like how not to eat a rock! You make my heart pound so hard I’m afraid it may burst equally with love and pain. You have so much empathy and wonder and oh, so many questions. You think about everything. You and I, we our bound in a magical tie that only exists between us. You are my best friend. It is me who you come to in the middle of the night after a bad dream. It is me who you yell at when things don’t go quite the way you expect or hope. It is also me, who you tell your secrets to late at night. You ask good questions, some unanswerable, but you trust in me with your heart. I hope to always be your safe place. Back then, I could only hope you would sleep another hour. Now, I am realizing how quickly the past 14 years has sped by before my eyes, it makes me want to take back each and every bedtime story, campfire snuggle, park date, and bike ride and do them all over again. Holding hands with my now 14 year old daughter feels so fleeting4 Like every time you let me hold your hand I wonder if it will be the last. Soon you will be entering high school and then soon after getting your drivers license and you will need me less and less. Please know that as you step away, I am rooting for you. It may feel like I am trying to hold you back, but I am in your corner cheering you on like no one ever will. I loved you so much then, and even more NOW.