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Have we talked about kids and mobiles yet?

Kristine

Kristine

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Sep 9, 2008
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If not, when, why, how?

We have had a discussion ever since my oldest started school - SO wants her to have a phone and I don't. I'm winning so far, she is in second grade (she'll be 8 this summer), and no phone yet. I don't really see the point, I know where she is all the time, and can always go pick her up, phone her friends parents if she's at a friend's house, or something like that if I need to get hold of her. I think at that age, she'll forget her phone at home, forget to turn it on or just lose it all together. It's not a cost issue - we have a family plan that gives us free calls to family members, and we can add a pay as you go card to that, so she'd be able to call and text us even if there's no money on the card.

The discussion has died down a little lately, but today it came up again. DD is walking home from school alone (with a friend though) for the first time. I think it's awesome - kids should walk rather than be dropped off everywhere, but SO is worried as she'll have no way of contacting us (her friend does not have a phone either), and he thinks it's too far (3km). It is a very safe road, there's little traffic and there's a footpath the whole way. They need to cross the road 3 times.

So, anyway, now he says if the walking is going to become a regular thing (it probably won't, but I want her to start cycling next year) she needs a phone.

Am I being unreasonable for not wanting her to have one? She'll obviously get one eventually, but I think the longer we can hold off the better. She wants one, but she's not really that bothered about it, only a couple of the kids in her class has one.

So anyway, that was really long, but my point is - does your kids have phones? Why/why not? How old were they when they got one? Am I being stupid?
 
my son has just gone nine and he had a phone for christmas,at first it was a novelty mainly for taking photos and listening to music,and in 4 months i have only topped it up once with £10,This week as its half term he has been over the park with his friends and has taken his phone,he is told not to get it out and flash it about and he never does and he rings us to ask if he can go a differant part of the park or to his friends house and i can get hold of him every half hour to check up on what there doing,so for me im glad i bought him one,its nothing special but he likes it and its peace of mind for me
 
my dd got one on her 10th bday and only because it was super inexpensive to add her phone. $10 a month. she has been super responsible with it and she does use it, so it was a good choice.

i don't think your decision to wait is stupid at all, kristine. i say, stick to your guns.
 
This conversation happens in many households so I don't think your's is an usual question. Here, we have lots of kiddos with phones because they walk and nowadays, you never know. I believe most are on their parents contract but some have gone with a prepaid phone to see how the child responds with such a responsibility. My cousin bought her son one although she drives and picks him up from school but she got him a prepaid phone which set a limit for her and for him. Once the minutes are gone, he has to wait until payday to get more. I was quite surprised to hear that he watches how much time he uses and has never used up all his minutes. Maybe there's a prepaid phone option in your area to try out?!?!?

And you are definitely NOT stupid. My kids made it through their school years without one. But I also understand that times are different than from 4 years ago too.
 
I am in two minds with this...firstly there is the part of me that comes from my mother...saying "why would you give a kid a phone?? Don't be stupid!". And then there is the concerned mum part of me that can see how handy it would be, and it could be a lifesaver.

At present my girls are 7.5 and do not have phones. It hasn't even come up in conversation yet and I don't think it will for a while as we are too far from the school for them to walk, and it's just not common here for kids that young to have phones.
I think we will have this problem when they hit high school.

For you having her walk 3km ...I would be tempted. I'm thinking of my girls and they are so scatterbrained and irresponsible that I still won't let them cross roads alone, let alone walk by themselves. My two would get lost very easily or do something ridiculously stupid and improbable!
 
My dd does have a phone and she is 8. We didn't get it for her as a luxury but we saw it as a necessity. Like your dd, she walks from the bus and she also has three nights of gymnastics a week that I drop her off for. I hated the idea that she would not be able to get ahold of me in an emergency. It only cost us 10.00 a month to add the line and it has been worth every penny for me to know she can contact me. It has really come in handy a couple of times. She has never, ever abused it. But she is a really responsible kid.
 
My oldest daughter is almost 12 and she does not have a phone yet. As you can imagine, this has completely ruined her life. LOL
Since I am a SAHM, she really does not need one...and she can already text on her ipod touch. However, we promised her that if she got straight A's in school this year, she could earn one. We're in the last quarter right now and so far, she's done it. So, I expect she'll have a phone in June. My feeling is that if kids need one for safety then do it, but if it is just a "want" they should have to earn it.
 
I think if it is a 3km walk I would get her one for safety reasons. If it weren't for the walk I would think you should stick to your guns.
 
my dd got her phone when she turned 13
and started 8th grade.
she has quite a bit of freedom
and does a lot of things after school.
and i love that she has that phone
to let me know where she is
and when she is going someplace else.
she is not allowed to have it in her room
at night (we didn't want her staying up all night texting)
and she can't take it too church.
nothing irks me more when a phone rings
or i see a stupid teenager texting
while at church............

her phone is cheap. @$15 a month.
unlimited text and 500 min.

before she got her phone.
and i knew she needed one.
i'd just let her take mine.

we've talked about just having a family phone
and then whenever a child needed it
they take it...otherwise it just stays on the counter.

now for my boys:
they are ALL over the neighborhood
running amuck.
there has been numerous times i wish
they had a phone with them
so i could tell them to come home for dinner
or that i was running out for a bit.
then for christmas i found walkie talkies
35 mile range..(my boys ARE NEVER that far from home LOL)
so i snagged them.
and now when they leave the house
they are required to take those.
i LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE it.
my 11 yr old ignores me a lot.
but he's usually just next door playing video games.
but my 8 year old talks to me the entire
distance of him walking to the park
or his friends
or when he's coming home to get something
or if we have a snack or whatever.
it's so cute
and i LOVE it.
 
Last edited:
Thanks for the advice! She loved her walk home today - it took them one hour:). I don't think she'll be doing it all the time, at least for now, but I'm sure she'll be doing it more and more.

We have decided to hold out on the phone for now - her birthday is in July, and we'll discuss it again then. Most of the time she is at school, at after school club, at friends houses or with me, so she can always borrow a phone if she needs to get hold of me. It is not the cost I'm worried about - it would be free apart from the occasional credit, as we can add pre-paid cards to our family plans that are able to call me, SO or the house phone for free. I'm just not sure that she needs one. Next year she'll probably start cycling and walking more, so I'll probably reconsider it then. I guess I don't really see how she'd be safer with a phone either. We live in the countryside (ish), so even though it's 3km it's not that many people, so she is never far from the house of someone she knows.

Jaque - I love the walkie talkie idea!

Laura - well done for holding out that long!
 
for some reason I thought that this thread was going to be about those mobiles that hang over cribs lol.

and that made me think Kristine was preggers.
 
I just got some walkie talkies, but where we live, there's not a friend's house in walking distance (a drawback about living in the country I guess). My oldest just turned 8 and I must admit, the thought of a phone hasn't even crossed my mind. She goes to a small private school and gets bused to the door tho.
 
This was a good thread to read, my DS will be 8 in May and is asking for a phone for his birthday. A lot of his friends have them, but we are up in the air as to wether we should get him one or not....
 
meems said:
for some reason I thought that this thread was going to be about those mobiles that hang over cribs lol.

and that made me think Kristine was preggers.
Click to expand...

:lol I thought the same thing too when I saw the title of the thread

My oldest is turning 7 and he asked me about a phone last month. I looked at him like he was completely crazy. I drive him everywhere so he doesn't need one now. I can't believe there are kids as young as 6 or 7 with cell phones these days.
 
I homeschooled my older boys and they were either always with me or with friends for so many years. Even when they played sports, I was at their practices and games, so there was never a reason for one. As soon as they were in school though, and traveling for games and what not...I had to make sure they had them with them. I was going in too many different directions with different kids, and I had to be sure they could be reached or had a phone to call me if they needed a ride. My youngest still had to wait till he was in high school though...

They must've all been about 13 or 14 when they got one.
 
meems said:
for some reason I thought that this thread was going to be about those mobiles that hang over cribs lol.

and that made me think Kristine was preggers.
Click to expand...

Oh God, please no :cry

I am so done having kids:)

Thanks again for your advice ladies!
 
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