Becoming Who You Are | Pad Patter - 8.6.15

[scrapsandsass]

So we all know that we're constantly growing and changing. Recently, I heard someone (Melody Ross -- Brave Girls) describe the process of becoming who we are, and she believes that becoming who we are requires us to let go of the things that we are not. We may have once been those things/that person, but as we get closer to our authentic selves, we let go of the things that aren't really us.

Totally clear, right? But it made some sense to me even though I may not be explaining it correctly.

So for me, one of the things I let go was playing the dumb blonde. That used to be who I was. In high school, I tried to downplay my knowledge/ideas/informed opinions because I didn't want to be seen as a geeky-smart girl. I did it with my family as well because my mom didn't like me "trying to stand out," so I didn't. I could kick myself for that now, but it was how I got by and who I was at that time. For awhile, I even lived with a guy who mentally tormented me for going back to school.

What about you? Is there a persona or someone you used to be and are no longer? Is there something you would love to go back and tell a younger version of yourself? Do you feel that you are changing and becoming someone new now?

 

[carilyne]

Ah what a subject! I'm working on a scrapbook with all that. I like Brave Girls, there are several others.
One way to think of it is letting go of the things that you did/became to please others or meet their expectations. For me it was being "Little Miss Goodie Two Shoes" but recently it was also being that niece (etc family expectations) that was the doormat and lived up to Auntie expectations.

Definitely changing and becoming someone new. Learning a LOT about myself in discovering I'm a Highly Sensitive Person and total Introvert. And you know what That's okay. For years it wasn't okay to be an introvert or sensitive, you have to become an extrovert. You had to change. No more for me.

I've thought about doing a self-exploration journal/scrapbook process, but I'm not far enough myself.

 

[KarenW]

Our first child was an unexpected surprise before we were married and my mother in law to be always made me feel guilty about holding her son back, and we were too young (24, really?) and that I wasn't really who he wanted to marry. So for years I tried to be the perfect little wife who didn't have her own opinion or felt guilty about spending money on me. I became the martyr, and it nearly killed our marriage.

It took years to settle into myself - I get this concept completely. Now 20 odd years later, very happily married and I am finally myself (and I can spend money and do things for myself without feeling awful). I wish I had stood up for myself far more than I did but at least I was lucky and am in a very good place.

 

[scrapsandsass]

Wow... you ladies are powerful warrior women. So glad that you shared these stories. Hugs.

 

[jaye]

I'm still working on it......I lost myself, then had a serious illness that I let define me for a while, then realized I didn't like who I was or what I became. Still in search of the real me as I really seriously lost myself so deep I don't know who I am. Now I'm just babbling, lol.