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Bad mommy moment.

crazygirl

crazygirl

Opening a post office
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Dec 8, 2007
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Ugh. I'm feeling so sad. And bad. And just plain cruddy. 1 month ago my daughter jammed her finger in a basketball game. It really swelled up and was sore. But she didn't gripe about it too much. Last week, I started worrying about it. As its crooked, discolored and still sore when she bumps it or moves it. I didn't think jammed fingers should be sore that long. I had my BIL (who is a doctor) look at it. And he was worried the bone had pulled away from the tendon. So he ordered an X-ray and we got it done today. It's really bad. Some of you may have seen my Facebook post. There is a fragmented piece of bone floating on top of her finger. It's a pretty big piece. It causes mallet finger. And doesn't heal on its own usually. She may have to have surgery and is devistated that her basketball season may be over. They have JV tournament next week. Track starts the week after that and she is a high jumper. However, I don't know why she doesn't think she can jump with a broke finger. Guess I don't know much about that. LOL. Anyhow, I feel like dirt for not taking her in sooner. If we had, she maybe could have just worn a special brace that helps the bones merge back together. Just an icky week over all. I'm ready for it to be over. OY.
 
Oh Jacque ((hugs)). Sounds like one of those injuries that presents in a more "benign" way initially. Please don't carry the load of that icky mommy feeling for too long, k?

I pray the healing is swift and smooth!!! ♥ (hugs)
 
I totally agree with Sara, don't pack your bags for that guilt trip. You're a great mom, but not a doctor...you couldn't have known, especially since she wasn't saying much about it. {{hugs}}

I hope it heals very quickly!
 
aww jacque. hugs for you both, but don't beat yourself up about it. It is nobody's fault.
 
awww :( I have had moments like that before and it's hard but you are not a bad mommy!! I will say some prayers for quick healing and relief for her!! xoxo!
 
Hugs, Jacque! Don't be too hard on yourself!

I do understand how you feel though, especially with your daughter so active in sports. I tell my kids that they know their bodies best, that they should listen to what it tells them. Sometimes it's the only way to see how serious an injury is.

More hugs and prayers going out to that finger to heal fast and soon!
 
aww jacque dont feel bad,twice fin has broke a bone and i thought nothing of it and didnt expect it till the xray showed it up so ya not the first to have done it and wont be the last,chin up girl,hope it heels quickly
 
I went for a run before taking my daughter in for an x-ray only to find out her finger was broken. So, I guess I'm next to you on the Bad Mommy couch.

All that matters is what you do NOW. We can't change the past.


Even if you'd gone in a month ago, she'd still be missing the tournament, plus she'd have missed all the way up to now, too. So, see, she got some extra play time in. ;)
 
Aw sweetie. {HUG} Please don't put yourself on that guilt trip. Its something that happens and since she wasn't complaining, its totally understandable. Hope she's feeling better soon but she probably needs to have it fixed so it doesn't affect her later on.
 
{{{Jacque}}} Don't beat yourself up over this! You didn't know and it's not like she was complaining about it! This will make her a stronger person! Kids are so resilient she'll be fine! ;)
 
Ug! That stinks! My daughter had the same situation - it happened at school in 2nd grade during gym class. The teachers said it was fine and just jammed, but I ended up taking her and it was really messed up!
 
We all do it Jacque! As a healthcare worker my kid has to be pretty bad for me to bring him to the hospital. My youngest, when he was just over a year old and was sick... I mean coughing and everything. The day I FINALLY brought him in, they said his oxygen sats were so low they were surprised he was still breathing properly... bad mommy.... and I work there! lol!

And just as a funny and may make you feel better, I work with a Dr. that let her 4 year old son walk around with a fractured leg for 3 weeks before she got him looked at... and she IS a Dr. ;)
 
Jacque. . . first of all, your daughter is one tough cookie for just dealing with the pain! So, don't feel bad that she just pushed through and carried on~ I smashed my finger last April and wasn't going to get it checked out, but my bruising the next day was so severe that I showed my neighbor, who's a trauma rep, and he said to have it checked. Glad I did~ compression fracture through the entire tip! and slightly through the next segment too.

I hope Lindsay makes a quick recovery! This is a small bump in the road and she'll grow through the process.
Hugs to you!
 
Aw, ditto to everything that's been said. We've all had these moments. I hope she doesn't need the surgery, but that it goes smoothly if she does. ((hugs))
 
Oh gosh... bummage for your daughter. But, don't beat yourself up over it, you didn't know! I so hope it all turns out okay. (*Hugs*)
 
Don't be so hard on yourself Jacque... there was no way for you to know especially if you weren't hearing complaints about it. Now that you do know the problem you can get it fixed up and healing in no time. I'm sorry about your daughters basketball season. I'm know how that can feel.

If it makes you feel better, when I was in 7th grade, a boy trip me in the hall on my way to class and I fell and landed on my hand/wrist. It puffed up immediately and really hurt bad. My Mom wrapped it in an ace bandage for two weeks before we finally went in for X-rays and my wrist was shattered in like 10 places. We didn't know. It totally happens.
 
Aww... I agree with Sara and Laura!!! (((hugs))) hope it heals quickly and she can get back to doing the sports she loves so much.
 
don't be too hard on yourself. sometimes these things are just difficult to diagnose... especially for those of us with no medical degree. your daughter KNOWS that you always do your very best for her, so don't sweat the occassional oversight.

(((hugs)))
 
Mommy guilt is terrible. My daughter fell down the stairs last summer and her ankle ballooned up and turned many glorious shades of purple and green. I didn't take her in, and she still mentions that it is sore once and a while. I still question whether I did the right thing. I'm sure your daughter will be fine after they fix her up. It's just one of those things that happens to kids. HUGS!!
 
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