The Day Sorrow & Joy danced MOC11

ouch yall! Sometimes the worst of days can bring out my best writing.

I've had conflicting emotions before, but on this particular day, they were raw and vulnerable. I was on Floor 3 of the hospital celebrating the birth of my first grandchild. She was beautiful and perfect and I was so proud of her Mom, I thought my heart would burst from joy. As the day went on, I held the sweet baby and loved on her Mom. I also watched the clock in the room with dread without even realizing it. See, on Floor 1, there was a memorial service going on. It was for moms who had recently lost a baby and I was one of the unfortunate ones to receive an invitation to this event. As the clock ticked, I knew the service was going on and I felt so conflicted. Do I stay on Floor 3 to celebrate this sweet new life, or do I go to Floor 1 and say goodbye to another? So I excused myself to attend the service on Floor 1. Now, while I had certainly cried over this loss, on this particular day, I became aware about just how many tears were left inside of me. I went to the chapel and thanked God for allowing me to be her mom, even if for such a short time. I laid a flower down at the grave and I cried. A soul cleansing, raw cry. The kind where you can almost feel your heart tearing. I then went back up to Floor 3, held my sweet granddaughter and my smile returned. It was as if sorrow & joy were dancing.

Used:
Believe by ForeverJoy
https://the-lilypad.com/store/BELIEVE.html