Love Lies Here

Sometimes while I’m breastfeeding you I just stare at you. I take deep breaths while I look at your eyelashes that your grandmother gave you, your nose that will one day look like your fathers, and your little lips that sometimes delight me and turn upwards at the ends. You are so peaceful at this very minute. In one hand you cup what feeds you, and in the other hand you clasp tightly the necklaces that reminds you of me. What you don’t know is that this necklace now reminds me of you. Every so often you open your eyes and look at me. Curiosity fills your deep blue eyes as your hand tugs a little bit tighter at my necklace. One day this necklace will be yours, my little baby love.
One thing that you may not know is that I adore everything about you. One day in the future you will hate me; you will think I hate you. You will spit those words out of your mouth faster than your brain can think. When that day comes I will probably wrap my fingers around this necklace and remember what it was once like when you did this. It will remind me that you don’t hate me. That sometimes we get angry. But this is all beside the point. Right now, you are three months old. You love to form the letter M with your lips. You tuck that bottom lip up under your top lip and M you heart away. I like to pretend that you are trying to say mom, but I should know better. Sometimes while you are M’ing you take my hair and twirl it with your little toes. The amazement and wonder in you make me weep occasionally. Not in the sense that I am distraught, but more that these moments are fleeting and they will never return. I want to breath you in and inhale everything about you. I want to keep you my little babe forever. I want to protect you and save you from the world. Because someday it will eat you up, and although I will be there to catch you, I won’t be able to protect you from it.
My sweet girl, these letters one day will wrap you up in the love I have for you at this very moment. I hope that they bring a smile to your face and an M to your lips.


Laurie Ann:
Sweet on You
Dayspring

Sahlin Studios:
Key to my Heart

Paislee Press and One Little Bird:
Fairy Tale

Heather Joyce:
The Teri

Juliana Kniepp:
Ephemera Wood 2

Two Tiny Turtles:
Remember Those Days Vol 1