What is the dumbest way you have been injured? | Pad Patter 12 july 2021

Oh Lord, so many stories! I am so totally clumsy!! My dad used to call me "Grace" when I was little because I was always tripping or falling.
A couple that stand out -
Sprained my ankle doing a happy dance in college when I got an A on a speech I wrote
Bruised my entire thigh running in to the arm of the couch playing with the kids
There is not a day in my life that I don't have a bruise on me somewhere and most of the time, no idea where they came from.

 

I could make a bulleted list of all my stupid injuries because seriously, the list is long and embarassing, but the two that are the stupidiest are as follows:

1 - when I was really little like 2-3 years old, I would come in the house all the time hurt and my Mom didn't know what happened. (we had a couple acres and she pretty much let us run wild). One time I came in bawling and when she asked what happened I said "I ran into a tree!" She loves to tell that story. Later she found out I REALLY needed glasses. I couldn't see where I was going.

2 - when I was in about 5th grade, my sister and I spent a week at my Grandma's farm with my 3 rough and tumble boy cousins. We all thought it would be a great idea to attach a red flyer wagon to the back on my grandma's riding lawn mower and then zoom around the farm with me in the wagon. My cousin was trying to get the wagon air borne and he succeeded. The wagon flipped over and I broke my collar bone. Ouch!

 

Oh my- I am SO glad I am not the only clumsy one!
*I fell face first off a curb at church while about 30 weeks pregnant with my first baby. Rolled my ankle and was able to twist in midair to land more on my hip and side. I was pretty worried about my son, thankfully he was super active and didn't seem too upset by the whole thing. EVERYONE in our "Young Married" Sunday school class was nearby and most of them witnessed the whole thing. I had been wearing a cute new dress with a scarf and tights, so thankfully no underwear was visible when I went down! I told my mom about the fall and realised that I had been all proud of myself for my cute new look, then fell, so pride really did go before the fall.

*While trying to make my bed (just wearing underwear before I got dressed after a shower) which was a really high four poster bed, I was kinda crouched on the side rail and fell backwards, getting my leg trapped between the bedframe and the nightstand. My nightstand has a pull-out tray to hold my nightly water glass, and it has a sharp edge, which my leg kinda got impaled on while falling. I basically cut open the back of my leg from my knee to my underwear line. It was a deep cut which I probably should have gotten cleaned out and maybe stitched, but I just washed it and put a ton of Band-Aids in a long row up my leg. It bruised horribly, and took FOREVER to heal. I now have a scar that looks surgical, it is so straight and long up my leg. Every time I am at a doctor where I am in a gown or paper robe, I get questions about it as it looks so weird.

*While changing sheets on my son's bunkbed (he was 5), I fell off the ladder, stepping on his Build-A-Bear toy's skateboard, which then flew out from under me and my legs were all cartoon-style higher than my head as I continued to fall and landed directly on my tailbone, which I broke. This was also part of the cascade of injuries which helped herniate some of my discs and create/inflame my spinal arthritis.
I have now decided making beds is really dangerous for me, and something I should avoid!!
I have also fallen (less embarrassing) a bunch more times, and constantly bruise from every little thing.

 

Eek! You guys make me feel very coordinated and suave. But, I did get laughs, not from your pain but from your attitudes!
The most ridiculous injury was last month in South Dakota. I got a two inch bleeding scratch on my leg ……
From a pillow.

my husband didn’t believe a pillow would do that. But there was a little tiny piece of metal on the zipper (a flaw that should have been filed down obviously) and when I was getting in bed I put my knee on the pillow and it sliced it open. Crazy!

 

I read this and I thought “what????” Lol - had to reread the sentence!

 

I tried to step over the row of seats in front of me at Garth Brooks last weekend and got my foot caught in the seat as it closed on me. I hit the ground with one knee and spread eagle right in front of a group of guys. I was so embarrassed.

or the time when I was 13 and got myself hung by my big toe in the Venetian blinds and broke my toe.

I am a klutz.

 

Nothing will beat when I fell down an entire staircase when I was 24. I was going away for the weekend, carrying bags, and attempting to step over my ex's mastiff.

I failed & ended up spraining my ankle and breaking my left pinky toe. I had to Army-crawl up two flights of stairs (we lived on the third floor/attic) to reach my cell phone to call my ex to come home from work to get me to the doctor's (and then had to have him half-carry me back down to the car).

I ended up spending a week or so at my parents' so I didn't have to keep crawling up & down the stairs in my aircast boot.

[I actually fell down that same staircase 2 years earlier but did not break or sprain anything then.]