National Tell a Joke Day

Discussion in 'Chatty Pad' started by bestcee, Aug 16, 2021.

  1. bestcee

    bestcee In love with places I've never been to

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    Anyone got any clean jokes? My mother-in-law has a friend that emails her a joke daily, most of them of the groaner variety! She's always looking for one to send back.
     
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  2. cinderella

    cinderella I was alone once...best.day.ever.

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  3. bestcee

    bestcee In love with places I've never been to

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  4. umyesh

    umyesh President of the Hangry Ladies Supper Club

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  5. umyesh

    umyesh President of the Hangry Ladies Supper Club

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    My favorite is this one:
    How do you catch a unique frog?
    You ‘neak up on it!
    I like to switch out the animal. I think the original is rabbit but I had to use frog here at The Lilypad. :)
    Definitely groan worthy!
     
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  6. gonewiththewind

    gonewiththewind I choose joy.

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    What’s Harry Potter’s favorite method of getting down a hill?

    Walking . . . JK, rolling.
     
  7. tanteva

    tanteva Even the professionals are bewildered

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    I'm really excited for the next autopsy club. It's open Mike night!
     
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  8. Cherylndesigns

    Cherylndesigns All glasses should be bigger than 1.5 oz

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    My youngest daughter and I speak in "Gifs" we use that function on our iphones and a daily conversation goes on for pages and pages. They've had a ton of rain and their first tropical storm "Fred" LOL and the first day I asked her if they needed a rowboat yet, this is the Gif she sent for an answer. It also looks like my cat. LOL

    My favorite joke EVER (please don't be offended anybody) - Guy gets to Heaven and Saint Peter asks him how he got there. He says that he was in a hurricane and God said he'd save him and he didn't, so he died. Saint Peter says "You big dummy, He sent you two boats and a helicopter" (Hence, the rowboat Gif from my daughter.) She knew that joke was coming.

    BBC30C83-D924-4C8B-A953-0F41F311B2E8.GIF
     
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  9. IntenseMagic

    IntenseMagic Some grannies cuss a lot. I'm some grannies.

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    What did the custodian say when he jumped out of the closet?
    “Supplies!”

    What did one nut say when it was chasing the other nut?
    "I'm a cashew"
     
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  10. Cherylndesigns

    Cherylndesigns All glasses should be bigger than 1.5 oz

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    When my youngest dd was a little girl, she and my dad used to call each other long distance (it used to cost - back in the "old days") and tell each other jokes. My dad loved to "get her" and one time, he asked her "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Her answer - "Why?" Dad: "To see his cousin "Gregory Peck".
     
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  11. Scrapping with Liz

    Scrapping with Liz Crafts for days.

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  12. bestcee

    bestcee In love with places I've never been to

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    Two more for you:
    What did one wall say to the other wall?

    Meet you in the corner.
    ***********************************
    Why did Adelle cross the road?

    To say Hello from the other side.
     
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  13. LivyBug

    LivyBug I should be considered yarned and dangerous.

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    What kind of pants does Mario wear?

    Denim, denim, denim.
     
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  14. tanteva

    tanteva Even the professionals are bewildered

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    Nope. Don't get it. Please explain for the stupid Swede. :crazy3
     
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  15. cfile

    cfile My bags are packed for Platform 9 3/4

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    My Grandfather's favorite...

    If April showers bring May flowers
    what do May flowers bring?

    Pilgrims!
     
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  16. LivyBug

    LivyBug I should be considered yarned and dangerous.

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    Haha, if you haven't played Mario games then it probably isn't funny. But denim, denim, denim goes to the rhythm of one of the sounds in the game.

     
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  17. bellbird

    bellbird Pollywog

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    Lol I would say you were lucky you didn't get it!
     
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  18. bellbird

    bellbird Pollywog

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    Ok here's an Aussie kid one

    What do you call a lazy kangaroo?

    A pouch potato!

    (Let me know if it doesn't translate or I need to draw a diagram)
     
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  19. StefanieS

    StefanieS Think it over, think it under

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  20. tanteva

    tanteva Even the professionals are bewildered

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    Oh, I've been a Nintendo addict since the 80s LOL ... but I guess I just never heard that the sound says denim. LOL Lost in translation, I guess LOL
     
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